Hiya

I miss my blog.

So: in a nutshell. I have a very pleasant, full-time, school-hours job which is nothing glamorous in the pay department, but that's okay.  The transition to full time was a bit of an eye-opener, but a year in we're getting the hang of it.

My weight is Back Up.  There's no getting around it.  It is back up Aaaaallll The Way and has been for a couple of years.  Since I have a short attention span, I have to keep remembering why I need to lose weight: I'm prediabetic.  Also I have GERD. And I just got some bloodwork back that is not great though my doctor does not seem to be as bothered by it as I am.  I don't need to look pretty or impress people-- nothing wrong with that, but it's not my priority.  I still don't think I'm terribly piggy or bingey or food-focused, but I am too fat, unhealthy fat, so there it is.

What is the plan?

• exercise every day
• eat clean
• accept that I have to do this to stay healthy and feel decent

I have a hundred complicated beliefs and theories about food and weight loss.  I read just about everything related to obesity and weight loss that has at least one foot in evidence-based science.  I wish I could appear on an all weight-loss-science Jeopardy.  "Dutch mouse studies for 200, Alex!" I keep thinking of that wonderful metaphor of the elephant and the rider-- there's this precariously perched rider trying to keep the elephant from charging off in the wrong direction and eating whatever it damned well wants to.  I am very ready to embrace the science that says people like me (teetering on the edge of a BMI of 30) don't seem to have shorter life spans (that's a whole 'nother Jeopardy.) But I can't get around the fact that I don't FEEL good, I get sick a lot, I have chronic problems with digestion.  I need to be kind to my overworked beta cells.

So I'm gonna go take another walk :)