Monday, December 28, 2009

State of the Union

Breakfast: protein shake
ZUMBA!
Lunch: turkey and vegetables, 1/4 piece of Naan bread
Snack: 1/2 cup homemade ham and bean soup (finally made some, turned out nummy)
Also: six or seven Marshmints and 2 chocolate covered cherries

So a normal, healthy diet plus five hundred calories of candy. Do I feel well on this? NO. Am I still gaining weight? Probably not, as I am Totally Off this week and getting in plenty of Zumba and walks. But I'm up three pounds which we all know takes me roughly forever to lose. And my self-respect is wobbly because I am not faring all that well in the siege of Me vs Christmas candy. The wise and obvious thing to do is to purge or stash everything. Some things have been purged, some stashed, some are now forming part of my fat stores. I found what my husband hid for me. So that has to be re-hidden :) It's funny how I went back to the way I regularly eat and exercise (habit), except that I still feel entitled to the candy (more habit? Pray not.)

On a more cheerful note I went shopping at the post-Christmas sales and have two more pairs of 12s in my wardrobe, and the tops I bought were mediums. So I can't really have ballooned as much as I have in imagination.

There is a very dear and moving post by Gina on Fit by 41 (see my sidebar if the link is wonky.) I think it's really to the point as we slide into the New Year. Where does the need to change come from? Not just the wish to do so, but that wall you hit where you realize, "Yeah, okay, that's it. I'm not doing it that way anymore." For me it was entirely health stuff. I had my share of embarrassing moments-- I recall being asked to demonstrate an outfit at one of those at-home shopping party hosted by a friend whom I may at some point forgive. It was these little knit tubey things and my body was just not ready to demonstrate knit tubey things. The saleswoman said something like, "Well, that's not how it's supposed to look, on someone ELSE..." Anyway, a stack of those moments didn't do it. I had to get to the point where I didn't feel good physically, where I had (have) real diagnoses looming if I don't do something.

Which is good to remember now, as I take steps into the new year and either hold my ground, make further progress, or get "comfortable" and let the sugar creep in and my weight creep up. Ugh.

So here's my line in the sand.

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Off to go hide some chocolate :)

10 comments:

  1. Give yourself some credit; you're moving back to center, and that's a very good thing. I do understand the discomfort, though. And to me, that's a very good thing, too. Being too comfortable with eating the no-no's could only lead to dietary ruin. :)

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  2. Exactly what Cammy said! But I hear you; high-quality sugar-free candy still has a boatload of calories, and I'll be working hard to undo the damage of the past four days.

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  3. Drawing the line in the sand is where progress begins. You said, "I am not faring all that well in the siege of Me vs Christmas candy". the Christmas candy has tempted me, but I have won that battle handily. Unfortunately, I did not win the battle against all the other Christmas foods. In fact, I got beat up pretty bad. I am ready to draw a new line in the sand myself.

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  4. "So a normal, healthy diet plus five hundred calories of candy."

    I had this healthy breakfast today that included spinach, and then chased it down with fruit cake and Christmas-colored M&M's.

    And thank you...for checking in on me, for your thoughtful comment and for here, sharing your own embarrassing moment (we all have them, don't we).

    I drew a line, too, but it was in the sugar.

    :)

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  5. I ate a bunch of chocolate truffles at what is hopefully the last potluck of the season. It's likely not too much damage done as long as you don't continue to repeat this.

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  6. Shoot for one good day, and that will get you rolling again. I'm on my 3rd day of no junk and feeling much better. It's that old AA saying, one day at a time. You can do it!

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  7. Congrats on size 12s. My embarrassing moments or crappy weight/size related things people have said to me are totally what fuel me to keep going. That and planning revenge........

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  8. I think we are all learning a lot about ourselves as we venture into the new year, huh?

    That's exciting about the size 12s!

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  9. I'll draw a line in the sand too! :D

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  10. Hey, we had our fun, enjoyed the holidays-- now it's back to work! Refocus girlfriend. You can do this!

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